Ranking Steven Spielberg's movies from "Jaws" to "West Side Story"

As Samuel L. Jackson says in “Jurassic Park” (it’s in the top 10!), “Hold on to your butts!” 34. “Ready Player One” (2018) Though it is tailor-made for folks like me who came of age in the 1980s, this projectile vomit stream of nostalgia-inducing references is the one time Spielberg used his filmmaking powers for truly evil purposes. 33. “1941” (1979) This epic, expensive World War II movie featuring John Belushi is beyond godawful, because the director can’t do broad comedy.

But it’s shorter — and more impressive — than “Ready Player One.” So here we are. 32. “Twilight Zone: The Movie” (1983) Spielberg’ segment, “Kick the Can,” stars Scatman Crothers as a Magical Negro who grants the white denizens of a senior facility one last taste of youth. The director’s charm is conspicuously absent here, making this a maudlin mess. 31. “Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull” (2008) I didn’t have a problem with that refrigerator scene. You believed Indy could outrun a gigantic boulder, yet surviving a nuclear blast in a Frigidaire was a bridge too far? I loved it!

Unfortunately, almost everything else in this movie is a bad idea. 30. “Hook” (1991) Neither Spielberg nor Robin Williams could combat that icky feeling of an adult Peter Pan returning to Neverland, especially with a smarmy Dustin Hoffman as Captain Hook. Julia Roberts made an awesome Tinker Bell, though. 29. “The BFG” (2016) In this adaptation of a Roald Dahl story, Mark Rylance’s BFG is drab, the story is slow, and the filmmaking is uninspired.

But the Queen of England farts up a storm in this one, which negates my earlier comment about Spielberg’s inability to do broad comedy. 28. “Always” (1989) According to Roger Ebert’s two-star review, Richard Dreyfuss saw the 1944 World War II drama, “A Guy Named Joe” at least 35 times, and Spielberg said it inspired him to become a director. With that much love, and a heavenly Audrey Hepburn cameo, you’d expect a better remake. 27. “The Adventures of Tintin” (2011) In this foray into 3-D animation, Spielberg treats the dull as dishwater TinTin as if he were Young Indiana Jones.

But Hergé’s beloved creation is no Harrison Ford. His awesome dog sidekick, Snowy, and John Williams’ excellent score deserved better. 26. “West Side Story” (2021) Why did Spielberg do this unnecessary remake? Great songs aside, this movie flopped because audiences rightfully didn’t want to see this outdated, racially insensitive material.

Also, I must ask where the hell in New York Rita Moreno’s store was located in this movie. 25. “War of the Worlds” (2005) Spielberg’s brutal adaptation of H.G. Wells’ classic story is maximum chaos with minimal returns. Tom Cruise and Dakota Fanning are not fleshed out characters, so who cares if the aliens eat them? The director’s love of killing people in horrible ways is in full effect here. 24. “Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom” (1984) “Temple of Doom” is the series entry that most closely hews to its serial inspirations.

Unfortunately, that fealty includes questionable tropes about women and minorities. Still, Spielberg directs one of his best action sequences here. The film helped create the PG-13 rating, which should have made me dislike it even more. 23. “The Post” (2017) “All the President’s Men” made me paranoid. “The Post” just made me dizzy. It looked like cinematographer Janusz Kaminski tied his camera to a rope and swung it around for two hours.

That level of distracting ostentatiousness is unusual for Spielberg. 22. “The Sugarland Express” (1974) Has flashes of the movie-making brilliance yet to come. But the characters really try your nerves and the focus is more on car chases than storytelling.

Still, an auspicious debut. 21. “The Lost World: Jurassic Park” (1997) Spielberg’s sadism works better in this uber-violent sequel than in “War of the Worlds.” I liked it more than most people, but it’s still a pale imitation of its predecessor. 20. “Saving Private Ryan” (1998) The opening sequence is the best thing Spielberg ever directed, and earned him his second Oscar for directing. The last 30 minutes are also impressive. Sandwiched between those two set-pieces is a standard-issue, ho-hum World War II drama that feels imported from 1940s Hollywood. 19. “Amistad” (1997) Twenty years after “Roots,” Spielberg tells the story of the international court battle over the enslaved people brought to America on the titular ship. The violent opening rebellion gets an awesome “Saving Private Ryan”-style treatment.

The rest of the film is an acting showcase for Anthony Hopkins and Djimon Hounsou. 18. “A.I. Artificial Intelligence” (2001) Haley Joel Osment deserved an Oscar nod for this. People blame Spielberg for the film’s ending, saying he sweetened Stanley Kubrick’s original treatment. Film bros always think Kubrick had neither heart nor sentiment.

Well, they’re wrong. That’s Kubrick’s ending. Live with it. 17. “Empire of the Sun” (1987) One of Spielberg’s more underseen movies is an acting showcase for a young Christian Bale. John Boorman’s “Hope and Glory” is a better 1987 movie about wartime seen through innocent eyes, but this is still worth watching. 16. “E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial” (1982) In an online survey I conducted, “E.T.” received the most votes for best Spielberg movie.

It’s down here because, if you read my article on “E.T” turning 40, you’d know I hated “E.T.” back in 1982 and only came to begrudgingly respect it as an adult. 15. “Close Encounters of the Third Kind” (1977) I fell asleep in my Pops’ car when my parents took me to see this at the drive-in. It took 30 years for me to eventually watch this movie. I thought it was fine. Great John Williams score, too. 14. “War Horse” (2011) I can’t really explain it, but something about this movie spoke to me in ways a lot of other movies on this list did not.

I think it’s one of Spielberg’s most delicate directing jobs, and one of his best. 13. “Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade” (1989) Who better to play Indiana Jones’ father than the original James Bond, Sean Connery? Add that origin story intro with the late River Phoenix, and the grumpy charm of Ford bumping against Connery’s cool, and you’ve got a fine ending to a series that didn’t know when to quit. 12. “Catch Me If You Can” (2002) Leonardo DiCaprio may be the charming star of this delightful con artist adventure, but Christopher Walken walks off with this picture as DiCaprio’s character’s father. John Williams is having jazzy fun on the soundtrack, giving Spielberg’s direction an extra bouncy kick. 11. “The Terminal” (2004) Jacques Tati’s “Playtime” is number 10 on my all-time best movies list, which may explain why this Tati-like Tom Hanks vehicle that nobody likes but me is so high on this list. Hey, even “1941” has its defenders. 10. “Minority Report” (2002) The best adaptation of a Philip K.

Dick story (sorry, “Blade Runner”) finds Spielberg at the top of his game when it comes to directing action and actors. Tom Cruise and Samantha Morton are great, and the pre-cog crime unit story feels even more timely than it did 24 years ago. 9. “Bridge of Spies” (2015) Spielberg plus the Coen brothers equals this suspenseful Cold War drama starring an excellent Tom Hanks. Big friendly giant Mark Rylance won the Big Friendly Oscar for this, and while he’s excellent, Sylvester Stallone got robbed that year for his work as an aging Rocky Balboa in “Creed.” 8. “Jurassic Park” (1993) This Michael Crichton adaptation is “Jaws” on land, with (at the time) awe-inspiring dinosaur F/X. That scene with the T-Rex is the most terrifying sequence Spielberg ever shot. 7. “Munich” (2005) This haunting retelling of the tragic events of the 1972 Munich Olympics massacre is Spielberg at his most mature.

Would be higher on the list if I didn’t think that last scene was a major misfire. 6. “Lincoln” (2012) As Abraham Lincoln, Oscar-winner Daniel Day-Lewis gives the best performance in Spielberg’s canon. This is also the director’s most process-filled movie, and you know how much I love stuff like that. 5. “The Fabelmans” (2022) Spielberg’s “All That Jazz” is as telling and brutal a self-indictment as Bob Fosse’s. Basically, he’s admitting what I’ve been saying all along: he likes killing people in movies. It’s also a lovely look at how life shapes the artist, for better and for worse. 4. “Schindler’s List” (1993) My number one movie of 1993 is perhaps Spielberg’s most important film.

This best picture Oscar winner has superb work by Ben Kingsley, Liam Neeson, and Ralph Fiennes. Considering the current attempts to redeem Nazis, it should be mandatory viewing. 3. “The Color Purple” (1985) I was going to put this at number 2, but I’ve lived with the movie in that spot a decade longer than this one, so it had to take precedence. Nobody, and I mean NOBODY, is going to shake my undying love for this movie. Of all Spielberg’s movies, this one has my heart. 2. “Jaws” (1975) C’mon, do I have to explain why “Jaws” is up here? 1. “Raiders of the Lost Ark” (1981) When I interviewed Karen Allen, I told her that “Raiders” was the best time I have ever had in a movie theater.

Forty-five years later, my opinion hasn’t changed. Odie Henderson is the Boston Globe's film critic.